Friday, January 2, 2009

Blue Isn't Just a Color

It has also been used to describe how one feels,, and I guess I can use that in my description of how I felt last month. It wasn't how some feel so desperate,, there's no hope and can't see anyway out of their problems. Mine was more of a " I don't want anyone around me ,,I don't want to do anything-- just give me my blankets my TV and my refrigerator and leave me alone ------forever!!!!!!!!!!!! If I would of been able to get out of work I would have,,, I skipped alot of church because I didn't want to be around the congregation ( some of whom I love very much) I didn't want to have to explain to the pastors what was wrong --- even if I really didn't know --- Rest assured they would have been more than happy to talk with me -but it was a very busy time for them and they didn't need some old person whining........(my reasoning isn't always sound) I wanted no contact with the world --- just let me be --- I know that's not the way to be,, but last month it sounded good.......looking at it now-- I never was at a point of complete hopelessness I have heard people say they're at... and I know I can't chalk that up to" what a great person I am to pull myself up out of the murk and mire and get back in there" but I believe it comes from my up bringing --- I was taught by my parents -- by my pastors and by my Lutheran school teachers that there is always hope --- Christ conquered sin ,,death and the devil-- the baby wrapped in cloth lying in a manger came to this world to die - but the tomb didn't keep him-- where they laid him those cloths are empty-- so no matter how I feel --- as blue as it gets ( and let me tell you I never been that blue for that long before) Christ took care of all that ... I am truly thankful for that and I thank God I was never in a place nor do I ever want to be in a place of complete hopelessness....... I have to keep remembering my life verse --Jeremiah 29:11 it's not a prosperity promise,, that I will have every thing I want --it's a promise of hope that He has given me all I need no matter what color I feel today...................................

3 comments:

Rev. Rick Stuckwisch said...

Thanks for your sharing your thoughts and feelings. I'm glad you're not so blue, and that the comfort of the Gospel has brought you renewed hope and joy in Christ.

organistsandra said...

So I thank God for your good parents and pastors and teachers. And I'm glad too that you're feeling less blue. Blue is a cheery color for the sky, but can feel pretty dreary for us.

TruthQuestioner said...

Glad the "blueness" has lightened up a bit. I missed you! Keep up posting!