Blue Isn't Just a Color

It has also been used to describe how one feels,, and I guess I can use that in my description of how I felt last month. It wasn't how some feel so desperate,, there's no hope and can't see anyway out of their problems. Mine was more of a " I don't want anyone around me ,,I don't want to do anything-- just give me my blankets my TV and my refrigerator and leave me alone ------forever!!!!!!!!!!!! If I would of been able to get out of work I would have,,, I skipped alot of church because I didn't want to be around the congregation ( some of whom I love very much) I didn't want to have to explain to the pastors what was wrong --- even if I really didn't know --- Rest assured they would have been more than happy to talk with me -but it was a very busy time for them and they didn't need some old person whining........(my reasoning isn't always sound) I wanted no contact with the world --- just let me be --- I know that's not the way to be,, but last month it sounded good.......looking at it now-- I never was at a point of complete hopelessness I have heard people say they're at... and I know I can't chalk that up to" what a great person I am to pull myself up out of the murk and mire and get back in there" but I believe it comes from my up bringing --- I was taught by my parents -- by my pastors and by my Lutheran school teachers that there is always hope --- Christ conquered sin ,,death and the devil-- the baby wrapped in cloth lying in a manger came to this world to die - but the tomb didn't keep him-- where they laid him those cloths are empty-- so no matter how I feel --- as blue as it gets ( and let me tell you I never been that blue for that long before) Christ took care of all that ... I am truly thankful for that and I thank God I was never in a place nor do I ever want to be in a place of complete hopelessness....... I have to keep remembering my life verse --Jeremiah 29:11 it's not a prosperity promise,, that I will have every thing I want --it's a promise of hope that He has given me all I need no matter what color I feel today...................................